Females help me out with some advice

[ChainzCooper]

Hi Chainz

Definitely do not use the Mom or "other girl ruse" approach. For many reasons.

If you have a hard time asking her out in person(this can definitely be hard and awkward, especially if your shy)-she gave you her email so in your email conversation with her steer her towards what she likes to do and then ask her (in your emal response)if she would like do do something similar. If that something similar involves an environment where you are known, welcome and have friends than all the better. It seems alot of girls like it when they know you are liked by other people (except for the "other girl ruse" previously mentioned) and makes them feel comfortable knowing that you are a "known" quantity.
Or perhaps ask her if she wants to do something that maybe you both have not done but "that its something you always wanted to do". That way you are both in a new adventure together-a little riskier of course but could be fun.

If you get that first date, be a gentleman-open the door for her, pay for everything, be polite to everyone, tip well. And always remember to be yourself. Don't put on an act.

And if the date goes well.... when you drop her off (and of course if she is not giving you major signals) Do not try to kiss her goodnight. Trust me. say good night you had a good time and leave. Then when you get home call her the next day and thank her and see if she would like to do something else-her choice this time.

Good luck-keep us informed.

This sounds good thanks for the comments. Yeah the more I think I'm just going to do this myself probably. But like I said I asked out another waitress who worked at the same place last year and never heard from her. Well technically I did chat a few times with her on the internet, but we never did anything. Turns out she has some kids so I guess it all sorted itself out.I guess thats why I posted this to begin with. But anyways, I appreciate the positive input
Jordan

[Phil Carter]

hahaha good one GM :-)

[The Grave Maurice]

Have one on me, Phil. You and Sam Flynn are the only posters who get my Latin jokes.

[DVV]

I'm vex !

So many years spent in Latin studies for the sake of De Quincey !

[The Grave Maurice]

I hate hijacking any thread, but I couldn't find another one in which to say this. It's very nice to have you back, David. We missed you. And happy St. David's day.

[mariab]

Have you thought of trying this one?
You know, I could lay a big line on you and we could do a lot of role playing, but the simple truth is, is that I find you very interesting and I'd really like to make love to you.

Hey, this is a quote from Tootsie! And it got Dustin Hoffman a drink on the face by Jessica Lang, despite Jessica Lang having previously told Dustin Hoffman (disguised as a woman) that she would follow a man immediately if he ever came up to her with that line.
Jordan, despite all “advice“, at the end I'm sure you'll do whatever you feel like doing. Still:
- NOT a good idea at all to bring your parents in that restaurant or to ask her out via your parents. She'll totally think you're lame.
- NOT a great idea at all to try to "impress“ her by bringing another girl in that restaurant. She'll get insecure, then she'll figure it out, and might get majorly pissed.
If you're still hesitant to ask her out (and I feel you, because she might say “no“ and then you're done), keep going to that restaurant, talk her up, and try to figure out who she is and what she likes. Maybe she likes some specific kind of music, and you could burn her a CD with songs you think she might like. That's a pretty romantic gesture, yet not “too much“.
Or maybe there's a movie or a concert she's interested in, and you can ask her out to that movie/concert, as a semi-date, and then you can see how things go, and after the movie/concert you can subtly turn the evening into something more “romantic“. Like taking her for an ice cream, a stroll in the parc, stuff like that. Don't try to kiss her unless she gives you green light signals. If she's already gone out with you once, you can easily ask her out again, and build up the “intensity“.
If she already has your email, have you guys ever emailed? If not, it doesn't really count. But you can do something with that as well. Or, if you have her number, you could text her and see if she responds. Don't email/text her something really lame, such as “I think you're so cute“ or “I've been thinking of you“. LOL. If you have nothing specific to say to her, keep it simple and natural, like “What's up?“ or “I'm so bored right now. Feel like texting?“ or something.
Man, I feel like a total pimp right now. But good luck anyways.

[DVV]

I hate hijacking any thread,

No worries, Maurice, Jordan should know : Amant alterna caminae...

It's very nice to have you back, David. We missed you. And happy St. David's day.

Thanks Maurice, merci beaucoup !

[DVV]

Must add how pleased and impressed I am by your good wishes, for David the Welsh isn't as famous as the 29th Dec King.

[mariab]

Have one on me, Phil. You and Sam Flynn are the only posters who get my Latin jokes.

Hey, how about Lynn Cates? He's our Latinist extraordinaire.

Chainz, one last word of advice. Whatever you do, don't listen up to French people (Sister Hyde, Rubyretro, David) giving “romantic“ advice. LOL. The French are total SLUTS. Meant in the best intention, as a compliment, but their advice won't work for American teenagers, unless you happen to live in New York, San Francisco, Socal, and are very experienced, blaséed, and cynical. ;-)
The way to ask her out “without her noticing“ is like I told you, for a “neutral“ date, to the movies or a concert, mentioning it a bit casually. The easiest way to ask her out if you're not sure if she'll say “yes“ is by texting. It makes it more casual, and her eventual rejection less final.

(À part cela, qu'est ce qui m'dit que Sister Hyde, Ruby et David vont bientôt vouloir me casser la gueule? Je n'compte pas trop sur des “merci beaucoup“s de la part de David, comme pour The Grave Maurice! Pourtant j'ai tout juste dit cela comme un compliment sur l'experience et la capacité amoureuse des Français. Allez, les Bleus! Dommage qu'il n'y ait pas de drapeau français dans la liste des smilies...)

Oops. I just noticed the catfight between Tom and some ladies. For the record, Tom is not a sexist pig. I can attest to that at 100%. Even if there's record of some people having felt “victimized“ by him. As for people warning other people about him, I don't think he should have a worry. Usually people are pretty enough capable of making up their own minds. And the best of lucks with keeping on writing your book. (From someone who's still unable to find some motivation for finalizing her book manuscript for publication, but will do it eventually, as there's no way around it.)

As for The Good Michael's question about blood stains on his fancy bedsheets (about which I don't ever wanna know how it happened), sorry Michael, bad news for ya. Unless it's fresh, blood's not easy to get out. You could try it one last time with generic hand soap and very forceful rubbing. Or how'bout the dry cleaner's?
Next item on my list is to start a radio show giving general advice to the general public, making pots of money.

[Archaic]

It's very nice to have you back, David. We missed you. And happy St. David's day.

I agree with you, GM! I always knew David was a good guy, so I'm very pleased to hear that he has finally achieved Sainthood.

It's pretty cool that they even gave him his own day.

Holiday pay for everybody!

Félicitations,
Archaic

[gizmo]

Rename this thread.

Welcome to the Forums edition of Dear Abby. What next, marriage counselling on the boards?

[ChainzCooper]

Hey, this is a quote from Tootsie! And it got Dustin Hoffman a drink on the face by Jessica Lang, despite Jessica Lang having previously told Dustin Hoffman (disguised as a woman) that she would follow a man immediately if he ever came up to her with that line.
Jordan, despite all “advice“, at the end I'm sure you'll do whatever you feel like doing. Still:
- NOT a good idea at all to bring your parents in that restaurant or to ask her out via your parents. She'll totally think you're lame.
- NOT a great idea at all to try to "impress“ her by bringing another girl in that restaurant. She'll get insecure, then she'll figure it out, and might get majorly pissed.
If you're still hesitant to ask her out (and I feel you, because she might say “no“ and then you're done), keep going to that restaurant, talk her up, and try to figure out who she is and what she likes. Maybe she likes some specific kind of music, and you could burn her a CD with songs you think she might like. That's a pretty romantic gesture, yet not “too much“.
Or maybe there's a movie or a concert she's interested in, and you can ask her out to that movie/concert, as a semi-date, and then you can see how things go, and after the movie/concert you can subtly turn the evening into something more “romantic“. Like taking her for an ice cream, a stroll in the parc, stuff like that. Don't try to kiss her unless she gives you green light signals. If she's already gone out with you once, you can easily ask her out again, and build up the “intensity“.
If she already has your email, have you guys ever emailed? If not, it doesn't really count. But you can do something with that as well. Or, if you have her number, you could text her and see if she responds. Don't email/text her something really lame, such as “I think you're so cute“ or “I've been thinking of you“. LOL. If you have nothing specific to say to her, keep it simple and natural, like “What's up?“ or “I'm so bored right now. Feel like texting?“ or something.
Man, I feel like a total pimp right now. But good luck anyways.

I've been eating at this restaurant since it opened in 2008 regularly and am good friends with the owner. I even went to his house one Christmas instead of having one with my family if that tells you anything. Heck, I probably kept him in business the first year or two because I have spent so much money there (haha). So me (as well as my parents) being there predates her by a few years, sorry. I do have this girls email address but I haven't emailed her anything. She goes to school full time and works 3 or 4 nights a week at this placeso shes definitely busy. I think one night when they're not busy and shes there I'm just going to ask her if shes free one night and wants to hang out. And that I want to get to know her better and really hope it leads to something but if we just become friends thats cool. A disappointment for sure but worse things have happened to me.The kicker to all this is that I work at a florist and have for lets see, almost 15 years now. You'd think I'd be giving sweet uniques out left and right but I've only done it a few times. I guess I'm just picky like that. But I should definitely save one (Or 12 haha) for her in the future. We'll see
Jordan

[mariab]

Welcome to the Forums edition of Dear Abby. What next, marriage counselling on the boards?

That's what I said.

I've been eating at this restaurant since it opened in 2008 regularly and am good friends with the owner. I even went to his house one Christmas instead of having one with my family if that tells you anything. Heck, I probably kept him in business the first year or two because I have spent so much money there (haha). So me (as well as my parents) being there predates her by a few years, sorry.

Sounds cool with that restaurant. What I meant is, it's best to keep your family away from your dating. (Unless you're Italian, or, sometimes, Jewish.)
Whatever you do Chainz, don't ask her out in a too intense way. Less is more in the beginning, and you don't wanna come off all stalker-like.
I'm sure she'll like your flowers, very few women don't (I don't, but that's completely atypical and irrelevant).
By the by, I've just realized that in my case there's been a significant amount of flirting/flings (including one serious relationship) and some really nice friendships initiated by a waiter/bartender or when I was waitressing myself. I guess it goes with the territory. And I assure you that it's much trickier for a waiter to ask a female customer out without him endangering his job situation.

[Sister Hyde]

I taste much better as a midnight snack. Sometime back I was forced to put Babybird in her place and in doing so intentionally pushed her 'sexist' button. Tends to work with victim types as you probably know. Unlike myself, Babybird prefers to nurse grudges. I on the other hand like to grudge nurses. And for the record, I have nothing against women...I think every man should own at least one. Now where's that coffee?

Yours truly,

Tom Wescott

P.S. And please, speak American.

well; that works too i usually get hungry from "reefering" around this time.

[Sister Hyde]

vraiment?

Je vois que ta réputation te précède David ahahahah