End of the World to Begin May 21, 2011

[Robert]

Hang on : the end of the world to begin on 21st, not "occur." How long is the end supposed to take?

[The Good Michael]

Thank God it't the Christians starting this. We wouldn't want the Jews to be the men who will not be blamed for nothing, do we?

Mike

[Zodiac]

Oh help us God. No, that should be "Zod"!!!

Hello Stephen,

I think they must have brought forward the impact time from 2012...hahaha

best wishes

Phil

And now a party political message from God...

Zod!!! How many more times do I have to tell you, ZOD. Anyway, where was I? Oh yes.... This err.... "Earth" business.

Citizens of Earth, friends,

As part of the over all package of painful, but really very, very necessary, cutbacks that are being carried out, in order to address the unprecedented financial defit we face, it has been decided to bring forward the closure of the "Earth" facility from Dec. 21st 2012 to May 21st 2011. We realise that this will come as a painful blow to many people, but such short term rescruturing, however painful, will be required if we are to get the economy back on track. Of the estimated six billion people who will no longer be required due to the closure, it is hoped that many can be lost through a process of natural wastage, self immolation etc. Meanwhile a very generous package of Voluntary Euthanasia has been put in place, and Earth staff are urged to look for new opportunities on other worlds, particularly in the "Private Sector".

Best wishes,
Zodiac.

[YankeeSergeant]

My hope

Could we send up Vanessa Felz to intercept it?

If it is to be the end I hope it goes something like this that aliens come and they only eat politicians and excrete O2 and water.

[Robert]

Could we send up Vanessa Felz to intercept it?

[Phil Carter]

Isn't there a bloody big meteorite due to to hit Earth around this time?

Hello Stephen,

I think they must have brought forward the impact time from 2012...hahaha

best wishes

Phil

[Robert]

Nah! Otherwise, there would have been a mention in the scriptures :

"And behold, a bloody big meteorite will plunge from the sky. And verily, even Al -Megrahi will be afraid."

[Stephen Thomas]

Isn't there a bloody big meteorite due to to hit Earth around this time?

[Robert]

Whenever the world ends, I want to bet that Al-Megrahi will survive it.

[Limehouse]

If the people predicting the end of the world really are Christians they do not know their bible very well! Jesus was preaching to his people about the final days of earth and the second coming and he said:

"But of that day and hour knoweth no man - no not the angels of heaven - but my Father only". St Mattew 24 v 36

[Magpie]

Are Ladbrokes offering a book on this?

Might be worth a bit of a flutter....

[protohistorian]

I think this is just the latest round of the Christian penchant for appropriating things from other belief systems because the sky daddy has not sent them a new book in awhile. Which is odd, because they do not seeem to read the other ones too well. Dave

[Errata]

What I find so amazing is that these people who consider themselves Bible scholars apparently missed the passage in the New Testament where Jesus says that only the Father knows when this will happen.

c.d.

That's because back in biblical time only The Father knew the fancy math. But we have way better calculators now.

Does anyone know when the rapture is going to end? Cause if it's going to take awhile I'll spend it picking out stuff for my spot in the Hall Closet of Hell.

[DrHopper]

I'm not sensing a lot of piety amongst the respondees! Excellent, I love it when some group of loonies decide that the world will end... and then it doesn't. There is a lot of awkwardness, some shuffling of feet and some clearing of throats, and then everything continues, usually with the "I miscalculated by a year or two" excuse rolled out whenever appropiate. Roll on 22 May, business as usual!

[martin wilson]

Whats this now?
I thought it was supposed to happen in 2012,based on the Mayan Calendar or something?
Whatever,either way I'm beginning to think that 5 year diary I bought myself in January was a bit of a waste of money.
All the best.