Rules for Singing the Blues

[c.d.]

https://webhost.bridgew.edu/jhayesboh/blues.htm

c.d.

[c.d.]

Let's see if we can expand on these.

Acceptable blues hygiene products: toothbrush, rusty old razor, cheap after shave.

You have no right to sing the blues if you own an electric razor, electric toothbrush, dental floss, or a night time eye cream.

c.d.

[String]

You can only use the back door.

[Pcdunn]

Gotta own an old hound dog...

You cannot sing the blues if you own a fancy fluffy cat, especially if you had to sell the dog and your old woman to buy the ungrateful feline.

[mpriestnall]

You can't be a geography teacher.

[Al Bundy's Eyes]

It is never acceptable to sing the blues if you had a quinoa salad for lunch.

[caz]

I think you are allowed to sing the blues if your baby leaves you on Christmas Eve, but what if he/she gives you a vegan cook book for Christmas? That would be enough for me to sing the blues until Easter.

I once babysat for a friend of mine and nearly lost the will to live when I looked along her bookshelf and saw a cookery book entitled 'A Hundred Ways With Mince'.

[caz]

Let's see if we can expand on these.

Acceptable blues hygiene products: toothbrush, rusty old razor, cheap after shave.

You have no right to sing the blues if you own an electric razor, electric toothbrush, dental floss, or a night time eye cream.

c.d.

My late father would have been okay then, as he always said he didn't need an electric toothbrush because he didn't have electric teeth.

Which is fair enough really.

[Herlock Sholmes]

It is never acceptable to sing the blues if you had a quinoa salad for lunch.

What if you were wearing slightly ill-fitting shoes at the time and you had a mild cold and there was no organic, free trade coffee on sale?

Blind Lemon Jefferson didn’t know he was born.

[Yabs]

You can’t be a blues singer if when I mention crossroads the first thing you think of is this

[c.d.]

I once babysat for a friend of mine and nearly lost the will to live when I looked along her bookshelf and saw a cookery book entitled 'A Hundred Ways With Mince'.

Are you sure it was a cookery book? I've heard some things about mince.

c.d.

[c.d.]

My late father would have been okay then, as he always said he didn't need an electric toothbrush because he didn't have electric teeth.

Which is fair enough really.

On a serious note, my dentist made me feel guilty and bullied me into getting an electric toothbrush. I always thought they were sort of gimmicky and a waste of money. But I tell you they are the greatest thing since sliced bread. Absolutely no comparison with a regular toothbrush. It's like getting a professional dental cleaning every time you use it. Dental health is important and they are well worth the money and then some. Check out reviews on amazon.

c.d.

[c.d.]

Acceptable hobbies if you want to sing the blues: drinking (especially in excess), gambling (especially if you tend to lose), womanizing (especially if you are not good at it).

You cannot sing the blues if you collect stamps, play bridge or go antiquing on weekends.

c.d.

[c.d.]

Gotta own an old hound dog...

You cannot sing the blues if you own a fancy fluffy cat, especially if you had to sell the dog and your old woman to buy the ungrateful feline.

I think you are good if you own an old one eyed or lame cat. Obviously hamsters and turtles are a non-starter.

c.d.

[Herlock Sholmes]

You can’t be a blues singer if when I mention crossroads the first thing you think of is this