Happy "We Beat British Butt" Day!

[c.d.]

At least here in America we know which side of the damn road you are supposed to drive on. Plus you are just jealous that we have great beers like Bud Light readily available to us.

c.d.

[Monty]

Uh huh. We beat, your pasty white British empire butts, with a couple of pitchforks and a winning disposition. I realize you are trying desperately to put up every "since then" scenario you can possibly muster, but the bottom line remains:

Colonial farmers demolished to glory of the British empire. Whooped by a bunch of farmers. I can understand how you want to redirect.

Colonial British Farmers....they beat their own.

It was more a realisation that we were globally overstretched. We decided to cut the deadwood, and that meant you I'm afraid. Far more prosperity in India and Africa at that time, and Australia...Asia...Europe.....

However you love us. You stole our place names, food and you took Piers Morgan off us, for which we are grateful. You even speak our language.

So, things aren't really that differrent. Still a pretend GB, just louder and a tad more obese.

Anyway...Happy Birthday to our lil cousins.

Monty

[Graham]

And do you have a national celebration every 30 April, with street parties and fireworks?

G

[Ally]

See how all the Brits have to deflect from the shame?

[Graham]

In the United Kingdom, 4th July is called Thanksgiving - need I explain?

And how's it going with the Taliban, Yanks?

G

[Ally]

Uh huh. We beat, your pasty white British empire butts, with a couple of pitchforks and a winning disposition. I realize you are trying desperately to put up every "since then" scenario you can possibly muster, but the bottom line remains:

Colonial farmers demolished to glory of the British empire. Whooped by a bunch of farmers. I can understand how you want to redirect.

[Monty]

Trying to recall where you come into the wining side of it....seeing as we roped the dope and the Russians beat us all to it. As I said, you tend to wander in when the opposition is on the wain or too busy making cocktails on the beach.

Kinda like John Terry.

If we had coconuts history would have been different.

Monty

[Ally]

Oh indeed, when it's y'all getting your butts pounded, it's upholding democracy. When it's us, it's American's foisting their warmongering on all the world.

But you are right. All that doesn't matter, on this glorious day. All that matters is we, the rag-tag band of colonists, whooped the buts of the glorious empire and all their pretty little red-coated nancy boys.

[Monty]

I recall it more standing alone for democracy whilst y'all sat on yer podgy asses with your fingers in your ears....till it hit your cosy lil Pacific sun lounger. Oh then you $hit yourselves.

Are we seriously going down this track? Cos I recall how those mighty Grenadians narked you guys off. So much so you raided their beach huts. Those coconuts bouncing off your helmets must have really smarted....ouch huh?

Monty

[Ally]

You mean when we come in and clean up the messes our European neighbors make? It's okay, you don't need to say thank you, we're glad to help when our neighbors start global conflicts they can't win.

Have you guys ever had a war in the last 200 years you've been able to win? Oh wait there was that whole little thing with Argentina a couple decades ago. Good job boys, good job. Them argentines is uppity.

[Monty]

The last time you saw a war from begining to end.

Usually you don't come it until half time, when all the hard graft is done.

Monty

[Ally]