Valentine's Day is just a bunch of bollocks!!!

[JTRSickert]

Good morning, fellow Ripperologists. First of all, I am from the States, but I chose to use a slang our British cousins use since there are quite a few of them on here and I'm sure the rest of us Americans will understand the term as well...besides, I didn't want to use the profane word (bullsh**) in the Forum for those who may be sensitive about such words.

This thread is specifically aimed towards those who may feel lonely and unloved during this Valentine's Day. I, for one, know just as much (if not better) as the rest of you. 2 days ago, my girlfriend decided she wanted out of our relationship despite the fact that we had never really quarreled and that I was a very loving man to her and maintained a good relationship with her 2 children. The reason she wanted out is because she said she had just recently gotten out of a divorce and that, even though she thinks I'm an incredible and wonderful man, she has too much going in her life that is bigger than me and her. So, she wanted to let me go. While I understand her reasons, it still does not hurt any less and I feel crushed and heart-broken right now.

[Phil Carter]

Hello JTRS,

My sympathies on this day to you sir. However, I find your open hearted feelings shared with us all shows a man of substance. Keep smiling old chap. As we Brits say....never let the b*ggers det you down.

best wishes

Phil

[Carol]

Hello JTRS,
I'm sorry you're hurting so much. You're better off without her if she has the nerve to come up with such daft excuses. Your new girlfriend is out there - just put one foot in front of the other and go and meet her! I predict she is gorgeous and just what you are looking for!

With lots of love,
Carol

[c.d.]

Hi JTR,

Sorry to hear the news. I have been there myself, brother. Nothing anybody can say will make it any better. It is okay to feel down right now. Have a few beers and know that eventually the pain will lessen.

Hang in there my friend.

c.d.

[babybird67]

hug for you JTR

keep a positive frame of mind...if she can treat you like that then she wasn't the right woman for you...so her leaving has left you free now to find the woman who is for you...the one who will make you happy, complete you and fulfil all your dreams.

Keep positive. Hugs.

[Natalie Severn]

You sound pretty healthy to me JTR.
Its nearly Spring, time to renew yourself!
Hugs
Norma
xx

[The Grave Maurice]

Ah, that's sad, JTRS. If it's any consolation, many of us have been dumped at one time or another. It's hard to believe, I know; but, as people have already said, hang in there and you'll feel better more quickly than you think.

[Hatchett]

Hello JTR

I wish to offer sympathy to you at this time of loneliness.

There are very little words of comfort that anyone can give you at the moment because no one can really mend a broken heart.

I know what you are going through. In this situation everyone feels that they are going through a hell that no one has gone through before. In a sense this is true because your love for this woman was unique, just the same as your relationship was unique and you and she are unique. So the grief of loss in a real sense is unique to you. But certainly many people will recognise and feel empathy with the pain.

Another difficulty in a relationship that ends suddenly like that is that it is difficult to find a point of reference and there is a terrible mystery as to what went wrong. That is a terrifying place to find your self in.

But life must go on.

For what it is worth, my advice is that you must let all and any bitterness you feel come out, preferably in private, with a letter that you will never send, or anything just as long as it all comes out. That way you will see the bitterness for what it is. Then you can exercise it.

Because I feel that the only way you can move on is to forgive your self, and the only way you can forgive yourself is to forgive this lady. Because at the end of the day all she has done is to reveal that she has realised that to find her own happiness she must move in a different direction.

Sadly that direction is along a road where you cannot accompany her.

One day hopefully you will come to understand that if you love someone you wish them to be happy. You wanted that to be with you. But sadly it is not.

If you can reach a stage were you can wish her well on her new journey, then you will be able to continue on yours.

I hope this has been some help to you.

If it hasn't then please forgive me.

I genuinely wish you all the best for the future.

Best wishes.

Hatchett.

[JTRSickert]

Hi everyone.

I just wanted to say thank you to all of your sympathies. It means a lot to me. I'm starting to feel a little better with each passing day.

[martin wilson]

Hi JTR.
Well,they say if a woman loves you it doesnt matter what you do,and if she doesnt love you,it doesnt matter what you do.
Its a lottery, who knows why this guy and not that guy? nothing to do with who you are, what you are like or any of that, just some strange chemistry.
And then the love of your life will come along,and if you were still with that girl you would have missed her.
She may be lonely herself one day and think that nobody loves her,and its her lifelong sadness that once,somebody did.
So every day,a little less hurt,till the day you realise you dont think about her any more, and someone smiles at you and you find real and lasting happiness.
All the best.

[caz]

Hi JTR,

Try to think of it this way. It can take a lot of courage to end a one-sided relationship. Many plough on with someone they care for but don't love, or love but don't like, more afraid of causing conflict or pain than living for many years with the wrong person for the wrong reasons. It must surely be kinder in the long run that your girl is letting you live and love again now, rather than staying with you more for your sake than hers. That could have led to far deeper resentment and unhappiness for both of you further down the line.

I'm a fine one to talk, as I have had two marriages and many a long year learning the hard way, showing about as much courage as a blancmange. I wish you loads of love and luck in the future, and a long life to enjoy it - with the right person next time.

Because you're worth it.

Love,

Caz (blimey I'm turning into Claire Rayner!)
X

[Robert]

Hi JTR

Yes, it's awful when it happens. Maybe 30 years from now you'll think, "At least I don't have to swim through shark-infested waters with a box of chocs for her now."

[Zodiac]

And all because...

Hi JTR

Yes, it's awful when it happens. Maybe 30 years from now you'll think, "At least I don't have to swim through shark-infested waters with a box of chocs for her now."

Hi JTR, hi Robert,

Wise words Robert, wise words!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1pg1zpNgB0

Best wishes,
Zodiac.

[caz]

Believe me, after 30 years she'd have scoffed the chocs and ordered you back into the water to take your chances with the sharks and fetch Johnny Depp next time.

Love,

Caz
X

[Robert]

After 30 years, she'd probably have scoffed the sharks.