Visitations, from the dead?

[Wickerman]

Here's something I wouldn't normally post about. I don't think it truly belong's in the popular "Ghosts" thread, this appears a little different.

This past April my mother passed away. One very kind lady, Jayne, who had been caring for her and visiting her regularly in the hospital told me that just the week before my mother died Jayne came for her usual evening visit.
During the course of their exchanges my mother suddenly remembered, "Oh, I forgot to tell you, Eddie came to see me this afternoon, that was a nice surprise".

Jayne was stunned, she didn't really know what to say. Eddie was my father, who had died three years previous.
The next week my mother passed away.


Another case, I have a brother-in-law, Michael, who is in terminal condition in a hospital in Manchester, he is dying of cancer.
Yesterday his brother, Sam, was sat with him in the evening. Michael suddenly told him, "my dad was here this afternoon.....etc.".
Alan didn't really know what to say, their father had died about five years ago.

I have a sister-in-law Carol who had a similar story. Her father, who was terminal with cancer told her during one visiting time that his sister Mary had been to see him, that was a change, that he hadn't seen her in a long time.
Mary had been dead several years.
Within a week or two Carol's father passed away.

There's a few other incident's of the same type of story across the family, but they all amount to the same story. A dead relative is said to visit with someone who is terminally ill, who subsequently passes away within days.
(Michael is still hanging on, thought the outlook is grim).

I don't know what to make of this. I don't believe in ghosts, or afterlife, or anything of that nature, so I'm at a loss to rationalise what the cause of this is.
I just thought I would raise this as a question just incase anyone has similar stories from within their families. Generally I guess, these kind's of incidents are what would normally be brushed off as "odd", and no-one gives them any further thought.

Regards, Jon S.

[curious]

Hi, Jon,
I don't believe or disbelieve in this area, recognizing that there is much that we do not know.

However, I do have a couple of stories exactly as you describe. Neither happened to me.

When an aunt died after being very ill for a month or better, her daughter told me that for a few days before her death, she had been talking to her late husband, parents and brother, telling them that she was coming to them soon. She would turn her face up toward the wall, smile joyously and talk to them.

My mother died on March 16 of this year. She was blessed with wonderfully loyal, caring sisters. One of them told us afterward that one afternoon 2-3 days before she died, Mama had talked to Daddy and "some baby." Since my mother had miscarried a son, I suspect that was the baby for in her last several months, she mentioned him a few times.

My mother apparently told my daddy, "Carl, I'm coming."

My mother had a heart attack on March 6 and was ill and uncomfortable, but alert, for several days. Then, the day before she died and the morning of her death, she was very vital, alive, pulling us down by the neck for a hug and "I love you." She ate a full breakfast the day she died and was in good spirits until she went to "sleep" and did not wake up after we were called in. Her condition changed from the time her roommate went to lunch, until the nurse went in to give her lunchtime medicines.

Like you, Jon, I wonder how widespread this is.

curious

[L A Lester]

Hi Jon

We have several before and after death experiences in my family. My paternal grandfather talked about the bright lights before he died of a stroke in 1963. My Mother spent months talking to her parents while she recovered from a head-on accident in 2001. Her injuries were so bad they didn't expect her to live. My maternal grandparents died in the 1970's.
Regarding after death experiences, my Brother visited my Mother a few years after his death. My Mother visited my Father a year after her death. My younger sister-in-law visited my older sister-in-law a few days after her funeral. She was angry and pulled down the kitchen curtains. That didn't surprise us. We always thought her second husband had a hand in her death but the coroner couldn't prove it. She had terminal cancer but her death was just a bit premature.
My after death experience involves the family cat. She adopted me, picked out my husband and gave us twenty years of great stories. She visited me twice after her death. The first time was a week after her death and the second was a year or two later.
I don't care whether these are figaments of the imagination or real unexplaned events. They are incredibly comforting.

Best regards,
Linda

[kensei]

I don't know what to make of this. I don't believe in ghosts, or afterlife, or anything of that nature, so I'm at a loss to rationalise what the cause of this is.
Regards, Jon S.

A simple question, asked out of sheer curiosity- With repeated examples of this in your life, why don't you believe? Don't rationalise. Rationalising often amounts to explaining away what is staring you in the face based on preconceived notions. I can tell you are an intelligent person. Apply that intelligence, and logic, and common sense, to your observations. There is a principle known as Occam's Razor that states that in a general sense, the most likely explanation to any mystery is probably the correct one. This does not rule out the supernatural being the most likely explanation.

[Wickerman]

Hi Kensei.

A simple question, asked out of sheer curiosity- With repeated examples of this in your life, why don't you believe?

Believe what though?
I have not had the opportunity to speak to those who saw these 'visitors' myself, and to my mind that is a significant drawback.
The second problem for me is, no-one else is said to have witnessed these visitations. That makes me believe these visitations exist only in the patients mind. Although terminal cancer patients are often heavily drugged, and some might say this could lead to halucinations, I do know that my own mother, though heavily medicated for pain was not halucinating due to the effects of drugs.

Don't rationalise. Rationalising often amounts to explaining away what is staring you in the face based on preconceived notions. I can tell you are an intelligent person. Apply that intelligence, and logic, and common sense, to your observations.

Ah, if they were my observations, I think I would know more than I do.
If I had spoke to any of these people at the time I would have been asking questions. Like of my mother, how was my father feeling?, how was he dressed?, how old was he?, what did he say?, all answers might give potential clues as to what my mother was experiencing.

If terminal patients are halucinating, then why are they not halucinating about friends & relatives who are still alive, why only the dead?
It might be suggested that these visions involve people who have passed on that the patient really misses, or really longs to see.
In two of the cases I mentioned, this is unlikely to be the case.
Alternately, perhaps the patient is scared of passing on into 'the great unknown' alone, and halucinates about a familiar face to take them by the hand as a guide?

The solution must lie in the patients own mind, of that I feel sure.

Regards, Jon S.

[L A Lester]

Hi Wickerman

It's likely that Mom was hallucinating after her accident due to the head trauma and drugs; and that my sister-in-law's temper tantrum was a faulty curtain rod but that can't be said about the other family experiences.

These deaths were blessings. They'd been suffering and it was over. We didn't mourn their loss - we celebrated their release. They'd passed over and in my family that is heaven (animals included).

The two experiences I had caught me by surprise. She was reaching out to me not the other way around. That's why I have no idea whether it was my imagination or an unexplained event. Why would my imagination create an event where I'm consoling her grief at leaving the family. Why would I create an event where I'm telling her how great it is in heaven and all the people she'll know. I'm a selfish person. If I was going to subconsciously create this scene I would think the image would be consoling ME!! Not the other way around. I don't do consoling. I stink at it. So why would my imagination set me up to do something I stink at. Thank god she came back a year later to scratch on my bedside and prance acrossed my feet. I guess that was her way of telling me heaven was ok.

The Nutter

Linda

[Rubyretro]

I don't know. I'm the sort of person who does believe in life eternal -but only because as your body rots your atoms become something else.

On the otherhand, I once worked in an old people's home where the the old people obviously died from time to time -I remember, with a shiver that I felt at the time, one old man, who was close to death, chatting away brightly to me..I really didn't understand what he was on about and he got quite irritated and said brusquely " I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to my wife, standing behind you". His wife was dead of course.

There were several people in that home who were obviously senile, and would chatter to imaginary people -but this incident felt clearly different. Whereas we might all have fantasy conversations with people in our heads, and the senile just exteriorise that, this man clearly was seeing someone.

But I know that it is possible for the brain to hallucinate visions which it accepts as being 'real'. So who knows ? It's very interesting.

[HollyDolly]

Visitations from the Dead?

My late father was at Brook Army medical Center in San Antonio way back in 1996 to get an operation to remove two tumors on his colon. One eveing while visiting with daddy, he told me that a lady and her child visited with him. I didn't think anything of it,as the hospital has patients and visitors all the time, and thought maybe they went into the wrong room by mistake.
Well, while talking with my dad , he told me, the lady and her child were there. I looked around.We were the only ones in the room. I said, where are they , i don't see them. He then pointed to the end of the bed and was very insistant they were there. I still didn't see anything, but told him,Oh yes, I see them now, as he was getting upset because i couldn't see them.

It was NOT my mother who died in 1982,nor any family member as he would have said it was grandma or some other relative. I had given him a scapular of Our Lady of Mount Carmel that belonged to my mother to wear. I never asked him to describe this woman and child, so I have no idea if he was seeing the Virgin Mary and the Holy Infant Jesus, a guardian angel, or what he was seeing.
I have on ocassions had dreams with my dead parents in them. Sometimes momma, sometimes, daddy, or the both together.Had one with my dad ,my sister and i taking a drive out in the country, which he used to like to do in life. It was even in color,there were signs for little towns along our route.Very real.