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  • #46
    Car alarms that go off at 4am because a piece of paper has drifted past 40 yards away. And then no one comes to turn it off!
    Regards

    Sir Herlock Sholmes.

    “A house of delusions is cheap to build but draughty to live in.”

    Comment


    • #47
      People who serve you in shops with a mobile phone tucked under their chin. When you ask them a question they look at you as if your being rude for interrupting their call!
      Regards

      Sir Herlock Sholmes.

      “A house of delusions is cheap to build but draughty to live in.”

      Comment


      • #48
        Morrisons in Wednesbury who have a tannoy system for staff instead of walkie talkies. So you have to keep suspending your conversation in the cafe because its like being on the platform at Kings Cross station.
        Regards

        Sir Herlock Sholmes.

        “A house of delusions is cheap to build but draughty to live in.”

        Comment


        • #49
          People who WRENCH the towel from the dispenser in a public lavatory.
          Kind regards, Sam Flynn

          "Suche Nullen" (Nietzsche, Götzendämmerung, 1888)

          Comment


          • #50
            Thickos on quiz shows who make the excuse when not knowing a question about the past “ bit before my time Bradley.”

            I wasnt at bloody Waterloo but i know when it happened!
            Regards

            Sir Herlock Sholmes.

            “A house of delusions is cheap to build but draughty to live in.”

            Comment


            • #51
              Originally posted by Sam Flynn View Post
              People who WRENCH the towel from the dispenser in a public lavatory.
              They should bring back the death penalty Gareth
              Regards

              Sir Herlock Sholmes.

              “A house of delusions is cheap to build but draughty to live in.”

              Comment


              • #52
                Originally posted by Robert View Post
                I ordered some suzette,
                I said "Could you please make that crepe?"

                (Bob Dylan)
                All hail His Bobness
                Regards

                Sir Herlock Sholmes.

                “A house of delusions is cheap to build but draughty to live in.”

                Comment


                • #53
                  Over-packaging - that's what REALLY gets my goat! Seems like everything you buy today results in a struggle to get it out of its packaging, which in many cases must cost many times the value of whatever is in it. Last night I fancied a steak for my dinner - ever tried getting one out of the latest shrink-wrapped plastic trays in one piece? I really lost it this time.....ate it raw. Grrrrrrr.

                  Graham
                  We are suffering from a plethora of surmise, conjecture and hypothesis. - Sherlock Holmes, The Adventure Of Silver Blaze

                  Comment


                  • #54
                    Answering questions that require an answer other than yes, with a yes:

                    "How are you today?"

                    "Yeah, good thanks."

                    The aforementioned superfluous "so" and awkward "can I get?":

                    "Are you ready to order?"

                    "So, can I get a burger?"

                    The equally superfluous "at all?"

                    "Would you like fries with that at all?"

                    One either wants fries or one doesn't. I like to respond with an equally meaningless:

                    "Not as such."

                    Also, minor celebs who answer interview questions with:

                    "No, yes, I learned a lot from scoffing that kangaroo's anus on the show".

                    I'd be so tempted to ask:

                    "Well is it no or yes? Or were you just talking out of your own anus?"

                    Love,

                    Caz
                    X
                    Last edited by caz; 04-30-2018, 04:53 AM.
                    "Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious." Peter Ustinov


                    Comment


                    • #55
                      "Would you like fries with that at all?"
                      How do you answer that one accurately?

                      Regards

                      Sir Herlock Sholmes.

                      “A house of delusions is cheap to build but draughty to live in.”

                      Comment


                      • #56
                        Originally posted by Graham View Post
                        Over-packaging - that's what REALLY gets my goat! Seems like everything you buy today results in a struggle to get it out of its packaging, which in many cases must cost many times the value of whatever is in it. Last night I fancied a steak for my dinner - ever tried getting one out of the latest shrink-wrapped plastic trays in one piece? I really lost it this time.....ate it raw. Grrrrrrr.

                        Graham
                        Good one. Bloody sandwiches that you need to be Indiana Jones to get access to
                        Regards

                        Sir Herlock Sholmes.

                        “A house of delusions is cheap to build but draughty to live in.”

                        Comment


                        • #57
                          People who dress small dogs in clothes and then carry them around with them. I swear that I’ve seen dogs looking embarrassed.
                          Regards

                          Sir Herlock Sholmes.

                          “A house of delusions is cheap to build but draughty to live in.”

                          Comment


                          • #58
                            Quote:
                            "Would you like fries with that at all?"

                            How do you answer that one accurately?

                            You answer, in your best James Robertson Justice voice, "I want nothing of the kind."

                            Comment


                            • #59
                              Originally posted by Herlock Sholmes View Post
                              Morrisons in Wednesbury who have a tannoy system for staff instead of walkie talkies. So you have to keep suspending your conversation in the cafe because its like being on the platform at Kings Cross station.
                              I was in Morrisons Wednesbury a couple of Christmases ago having a look at the dvd's.
                              There was a woman doing the same a few feet away.
                              Another woman came up to the first. I didn't hear what passed between them, but as she walked away the second woman called back "I hope you die soon!"
                              Merry Christmas to you too.
                              Then again, Wednesbury has always been weird. There was a bloke dressed up as Spider-Man minus the mask collecting money for charity on the forecourt of the garage on the Walsall road.
                              I don't know what happened to him. Perhaps he met his nemesis, Bathman.

                              All the best.

                              Comment


                              • #60
                                I worked in Wednesbury for a couple of years. Weird? It's weirder than weird! Never been the same since all the foundries and steelworks closed, but even then it was weird. Are the old gates of the now-demolished Patent Shaft Company still standing all on their own in the middle of wasteland and dereliction?

                                Graham
                                We are suffering from a plethora of surmise, conjecture and hypothesis. - Sherlock Holmes, The Adventure Of Silver Blaze

                                Comment

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