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"Always carry a flask of whiskey in case of snakebite. Furthermore always carry a small snake" - W.C. Fields
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Keith Miller, Australian cricketing great and Word War Two pilot, putting life in perspective when asked about the pressure of playing Test cricket:
''I'll tell you what pressure is. Pressure is a Messerschmitt up your arse. Playing cricket is not.''Comment
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Hi Harry - I'm sure the great South African golfer Gary Player would subscribe to that. Upon being labelled a lucky player, he countered:Originally posted by harry View Post
''The harder I practice, the luckier I get.''
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"Women are like pianos. Some are upright; the rest are grand". I don't know who came up with that one and it's not very PC - but quite funny IMHO."It is a capital mistake to theorise before one has data. Insensibly one begins twisting facts to suit theories instead of theories to suit facts." Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (as Sherlock Holmes).Comment
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The fun is very much in the non-PC... a variation of this being "Men are like tiles. If you lay them properly, you can walk all over them for years to come"
The Keith Miller story reminds me of an actual quote of my grand dad who served in the German army on the eastern front in 43/44. He became a diesel mechanic after the war and used to say: "if you can fix a tank engine in a minus 40 degree blizzard, while being shot at, you can do anything..."Comment
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O Lord! thou knowest how busy I must be this day: if I forget thee, do not thou forget me.
Jacob Astley, 1st Baron Astley of Reading (before the Battle of Edgegill)"It is a capital mistake to theorise before one has data. Insensibly one begins twisting facts to suit theories instead of theories to suit facts." Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (as Sherlock Holmes).Comment
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"Don't send me flowers when I'm dead. If you like me send them while I'm still alive." Brian Clough OBE"It is a capital mistake to theorise before one has data. Insensibly one begins twisting facts to suit theories instead of theories to suit facts." Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (as Sherlock Holmes).Comment
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Just added "March on boys".Originally posted by Bridewell View PostMy name is Dave. You cannot reach me through Debs email account
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"Give it you greedy bast....oh, great goal!" Alan Ball (as Geoff Hurst scored his hat-trick goal)."It is a capital mistake to theorise before one has data. Insensibly one begins twisting facts to suit theories instead of theories to suit facts." Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (as Sherlock Holmes).Comment
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Somehow reminds me of the Johnny Rotten version of that Neil Diamond song.Originally posted by Bridewell View PostMy name is Dave. You cannot reach me through Debs email accountComment
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Different versions exist, but here is one.
"I never made a mistake in my life, though once I thought I had, but I was wrong."Regards, Jon S.Comment
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Use that one a bit.
"I thought I made a mistake once,however I was wrong".
The look on peoples' faces makes it very worthwhile.My name is Dave. You cannot reach me through Debs email accountComment
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My version isOriginally posted by DJA View Post
I thought I was wrong once.
Turned out I was mistaken.G U T
There are two ways to be fooled, one is to believe what isn't true, the other is to refuse to believe that which is true.
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Just slip it into an "appropriate" discussion. Real understated casual dead pan.
Works well with medical staff,doctors,nurses.
Don't you love it when you go to the reception desk and are asked "How are you today?" AARRRGHHH!My name is Dave. You cannot reach me through Debs email accountComment
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I recall Clough's response when asked if he thought that he was the best manager in the world:Originally posted by Bridewell View Post
"I'm definitely in the top one."
Regards
Herlock
“All conspiracy theories are the product of the subconscious attempt of an ignorant yet creative mind to counteract the fear of the unknown with the tales of fantasy.” Abhijit Naskar.
“Conspiracy theorists, she knew, were paranoid by definition, and usually with good reason - they were indeed being watched, largely because they were standing on an upturned bucket, haranguing the sheeple with their wingnut delusions.” Mick Herron.
”The most confused you will ever get is when you try to convince your heart and spirit of something your mind knows is a lie.” Shannon L. Alder.Comment
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