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  #11  
Old 06-13-2017, 02:35 PM
GUT GUT is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by andy1867 View Post
I am a moustached Yankee ,and my calling it is medical
l walk the streets of London and the whores TUMBLE ,TYrannical!
Once chewin' on a uterus, on glancing down thought "what is this?, "
A diner in the gutter sits, looking quite maniacal

Well me being not the one to judge a diner or his habitat
in case he chanced to ask the question, "god why are you eating that!"
I gave a polite cough above, and asked "What are you doing love?"
he then said "keep yer AARON Guv" I'm simply dining... "A la cat"
Sams was better.
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There are two ways to be fooled, one is to believe what isn't true, the other is to refuse to believe that which is true.
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  #12  
Old 06-13-2017, 10:07 PM
andy1867 andy1867 is offline
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Originally Posted by GUT View Post
Sams was better.
I would have to agree
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  #13  
Old 06-13-2017, 10:15 PM
GUT GUT is offline
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Originally Posted by andy1867 View Post
I would have to agree
But both were better than anything I could come up with.
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There are two ways to be fooled, one is to believe what isn't true, the other is to refuse to believe that which is true.
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  #14  
Old 06-14-2017, 01:12 AM
Harry D Harry D is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam Flynn View Post
I am the very devle of a homicidal criminal
In leaving clues and billets-doux and messages subliminal.
Some people think that I was born an heir to Crown Imperial
Or that I am a surgeon, quack or other such material;
Some swear I am an escapee from Bedlam or The Priory
Or claim I write confessions in a flirty, dirty diary;
And theorists who swear I am a madman from the milit'ry
And seek my where- and there-abouts with tactics dull and dilat'ry.
Despite all that I use my knife with cunning and impunity
And mystify the Law as if I have a strange immunity.
In short, by sending billets-doux and messages subliminal,
I am the very devle of a homicidal criminal!

I'm not averse to writing verse and punning, purple prosody
Or taunting vigilantes with a poison-penned ferocity,
Al-fresco amputations carried out with gay frivolity
And posting off the offal with a letter just for jollity.
I scoff at those who think that I'm incorrigibly dastardly
Or that I wear an apron with my trouser-leg half-mastedly,
Or that I am a sinner with a penchant for idolatry -
In truth such vices as I have are secretive and solit'ry.
I trip the dark fantastic with phenomenal celerity
Engage in deathly dances with a terrible temerity
And so, by leaving billets-doux and messages subliminal
I am the very devle of a homicidal criminal!

I'm held by sleuthing amateurs to be one of the Peerage,
Or yet a merchant seaman come from Lisbon stowed in steerage,
Or that I am a rotten cotton-merchant down from Battlecrease,
Or even Lewis Carroll - if I were, then Wonders never cease!
Some say I am a barber from some harbour on the Vistula,
Or that I am a painter with a dainty little fistula,
A transatlantic actor with a dual personality,
Or suicidal barrister of dubious morality.
The fact that I was none of those is quite self-evidentiary
And who I was, you shall not know for yet another century
Because, in truth, I left no proof or messages subliminal
I shall remain the devle of a homicidal criminal!
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